The Prodigal

 

 

I feel quite miserable yet hopeful that things will change for the better. The emotional cycle I go through is quite unpredictable, from summit to trough, extremely at both ends of the spectrum. In light of various circumstances, I am still thankful of the fact that despite failures, mistakes and wrong decisions, I am being given the nth lease to life.

As I harbor these feelings, I savor, though reluctantly, the pain it brings; for only through suffering the pain that true joy arises. The picture of the prodigal son being embraced by his welcoming father brings me to a realization of how humanly possible unconditional love is; how humanly possible we fall into the quagmire of our own selfishness, and how humanly possible, despite our pride, we learn to humble ourselves before our defeat and failures. The magnitude of the frame of the human condition that the parable of the prodigal son succinctly captures brings humanity closer to the divine. For what is to love and forgive but divine.

I go through the depths of my being, knowing fully well how and why I have come to this point. Yet, I am not ready to face reality as it poses itself to me. The world as I see it, depends much on the creations of each and every mind that enters into time-space, being degenerated into the limitations of the material; the spiritual left to fend for its own. I wonder why in the magnificence of it all, there is a seeming lack that haunts my very soul, draining each and everytime whatever hope or promise there is. I harbor these feelings, knowing full well that these too shall pass.

As I open my heart in the words of men, I open my soul to the universe, to accept me as a newly born child, with my cries of dependence, excited about the first rays of sunshine to touch my skin or the first taste of human love. There is a wonder to it all and I savor new life, the new eyes, the new breath, when everything is new despite its oldness.

I speak to the universe, to carry me to its bossom, to bring back its prodigal son to its embrace, and rather soothingly, in all love, whisper in my ear, the gentle and sweet words," welcome back my child."

The Power Within

What of the power within, what of the hero inside, what of the divine in thyself. 

It is a liberating thought; a freeing idea, a breath of fresh air after a period of dreary melancholy. What of the power within, does give life to a death of existence, lived each day only to survive. Each day is a creation, of thought, of actions, of life. Each day finds meaning only because I have chosen to find meaning. Life is a choice, my everyday existence is a choice to live.

It is a choice to be happy. I am happy beyond measure for I choose to be happy. In everything, there is happiness, even in the most uncertain and unexpected of situations. Happiness begins within, from a self-fulfillment only you and I understand. The walls that were built by centuries of beliefs and traditions are walls penetrable not by resistance but by sheer understanding of the power within. The walls that divide between you and your happiness, between you and yourself, between you and your destiny, are walls readily  fallen by the might of your choice - to be happy, to be yourself, to fulfill your destiny. No one else can give you and I the happiness we desire. It is you. It is I. 

I shout it to the universe, I declare it to realms unknown, I surrender. I surrender to to the infinite possibilities of life. I surrender to the magnificence of it all, to the beauty of life still unbeknownst to men. I surrender to the magnanimity of the powers within and without, to the living vibrance and essence that makes grass grow, that caresses the blossoming flower as dew drops trickle to the heart of its beauty. There is something, someone greater than ourselves. I surrender. 

What of the hero inside, does brave the battles as opportunities to grow. I look for strength, but only within does true courage reside. The courage to rise above the din of the crowd, a crowd created by a multitude, a multiplicity of uncertainties and anxieties, a multiplicity of worries and denials. I rise above it all. 

I emerge victorious, broken yet whole, broken only to be re-born, only to find the self that has always been. I emerge free, flowing as the river flows into the ocean of my destiny.  I emerge free, blowing as the wind blows, around and to the nether lands.I emerge free, dancing to the music of my heart, to the tune of my destiny. I am free. 

I look at the sky above, in a moonless starry night. My heart leaps with joy, as I feel myself part of a universe, created to provide me everything I need and I ever want. As I look beyond the horizon, beyond that stars that twinkle in their solitary place, I find myself - among the stars, among the promise of hope and of life. As I sing my song, the tunes of the universe sing along. 

What of the divine!