I write yet again after a long period of slumber. I missed doing this. I hope I will be able to update this blog more often from now on...
Bliss! I am not sure what emotional state I am in at the moment, it seems everything is mixed up for now. A lot has indeed happened and I can't seem to process these yet...I am at a crossroads, of uncertainty and certainty; of fear and hope; of highs and lows...Yet, I am excited of what is to come, for me, for us, for the vast network of interconnectedness where I belong. I long for change and change is to come.
The long wait is finally over. Our appointment signed by the President was finally released. Clouds of doubt and uncertainty have finally settled to their resting place. I finally tendered resignation. I finally am resolved to take this step further; take a risk further; push myself further. I am hopeful. I am excited.
As these all are happening, something within me remains restless, restless as a child wanting comfort from the bosom of his mother; restless as a cub waiting for the warmth of love; restless as a river flowing silently into the sea. Oh, the tempest of it all! Something within me is longing for something else; something more than honor or praise, appreciation and recognition; something more than the soothing caresses of the wind in the midnight run or the soft embrace of the night as it beckons me to sleep. Something within me just can't settle for anything less anymore.
I am in search for more than what is now. What is seems linear at this point; that the curves and blinds of the road become exciting, mysterious as they may seem, yet they give the influx of energy to the weary traveler. I am in search for something more than the water that quenches my thirst in this dry and arid land. An oasis is in sight yet the mirage seems to be more appealing that the oasis itself. For when in the oasis, the beauty of it all, surreal as it may seem, will soon fade and give way to the ordinary. Soon, the excitement will fade along.
Yet I am hopeful for what is to come. It is there where I shall continue to live my life and paint the picture of my destiny. It is there where I will reach the heights and surrender totally to the immensity of the universe and all there is. It is there where I will sway with the cadence of the wind in a dance that will bring me closer to life. It is there where I shall begin to live, be born again, hoping that the world will welcome me once more and yet again introduce me to the wonders of it all. It is in what is to come that the present finds meaning.
Bliss! for the world is full of happy accidents, pleasant surprises and unexpected turns.
